I just got off the phone with a dear woman who is recovering from a double mastectomy. As she described what she was going through, it took me back to my own recovery from the same surgery. IT. WAS. SO. HARD.
After chemotherapy and immunotherapy, I honestly thought the double mastectomy would be easier in comparison. I was very wrong. There’s so much about it that the doctors don’t tell you. Probably because if they did, you would not go through with it!
Weight off your chest
Now that I’m on the other side of recovery, I am so glad that I did it. Of course because I am here and I’m alive, but I’m also happy with my decision to “get my womanly figure back” as my grandmother put it. I did contemplate the idea of going flat, and believe me, right after the surgery, I deeply regretted that I did not go that route because the tissue expanders felt like I was wearing a steel bra that I could never take off. Like someone had put 5 pound weights on each breast. I felt claustrophobic. I told my husband to take me back to the hospital so I could have them removed. I reiterated this to my plastic surgeon as well at my post-op check up, but he said that my brain would eventually stop signaling to my body that it needed to be in pain or that there were foreign objects there. Was there something that I could take to speed up that process?
I took my pain pills for so long that the nurses began to question why I was taking them. Um, because I’m STILL. IN. PAIN. Weeks later, I was still in pain. I thought that I would bounce back after a couple of weeks, that it would be similar to my c-section, but it was not. It was much harder.
I slept in an upright position for nearly 6 weeks. Partly because of the pain and partly because I was afraid that I might be in pain. I walked around like a T-rex, unable to lift my arms higher than my belly button. When I finally had to go to physical therapy around week 8, I was asked to roll onto my side. “I can’t do that,” I replied. “Have you tried?” she asked. I responded with a no. Once I tried, I realized it wasn’t so bad after all, but I was too scared to do it alone.
This too shall pass
All this to say, here I am on the other side of that valley, and I am okay. And you are going to be okay too! You will get through this. This will pass. It took me 6-8 weeks before I felt like I was coming out of it. Some women heal up in 2-3 weeks. God bless them. I wish I would have. It was about the time that my husband began to have a mental breakdown with the load he was carrying (job + kids + house + me) when I began to turn the corner. My oncologist also gave me a nerve blocker on top of the pain medicine which really helped, so you can talk to your doctor about that as well.
Now I am happy that I did it and have something to show for it. I just want to encourage you if you feel like it’s taking too long or hurting to much or not worth it, give yourself a good two months and then reassess the situation. Your body really does adjust to the expanders/implants and miraculously heals itself.
Also humor helps. So find some funny Youtube videos or a comedy on Netflix (or ten because let’s be honest, you’re not going to be able to do too much else) and take it easy. Order in as much as you want and say yes to EVERYONE who offers to bring you a meal. You will heal. This too will become a distant memory, not a fond memory, but a distant one. And you will have a story of hope to share with someone else recovering from surgery like you once did.
You might also like 15 Essentials for Cancer Treatment: Chemo, Radiation, and Surgery.
